…the VIP chronicles… (Confessions)
It’s STORYTIME!!!!
Back in high school, I ran with a pack of girls collectively known as VIP. Admittedly, I was the shy, slow-developing one in the group…late blooming among the girls who wore heels to school (which, my loves under 19, was NOT standard practice as many a blog would have you believe) gave me a wee bit of a complex, but I was glad I got to hang out and do cool ish. We had many an adventure together. This is one of them.
For a very brief time one summer after graduation, a group of my friends and I used to be backup dancers for a drag queen who went by the name of Princess Brianna. We had rehearsals in an apartment complex rec room and there was a lot of loud music and Victoria’s Secret body mist spray-down sessions. Princess B told me that if you spray yourself all over first, the air will be perfumed when you start to sweat. I still believe it to this day.
Since Princess B didn’t play, we practiced for hours a day several days a week. My dad ended up questioning me about the man was I was spending so much time with…understandable because I was 16 at the time and only spoke vaguely about “Charles” while running in or out of the house. He insisted on meeting this mystery man to find out what I was up to. Charles came by one night after we finished practice wearing workout clothes and lip gloss. After they met, dad didn’t ask about it anymore.
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Since VIP had a very high “hood fly” standard (and again, because Princess B didn’t play) all the girls had to get 20″ weaves. This was my first one and after it was sewn in, YOU COULDN’T TELL ME SHIT. Nope. No matter how ridiculous I was looking, I thought I was the hotness (*imaginary hair flip*). Even when I went to take my college ID picture in a wife beater, sports bra, overalls, and blue chucks, my extended yaki was on point:
The fresh face of youth…and yaki…circa 2000. This is the best ID picture I have ever taken. Oh, and FIGHT ON!!
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We practiced and practiced until the night of the performance. When we got to the location, I was extremely nervous, but calmed down after I realized this was going to be more organized battle dancing than stage show. A group would perform in the middle of the club with the crowd surrounding and said crowd would cheer or heckle. The festivities were hosted by Ebony Lane seen here:
W.E.R.K!
Once I saw the competition, I knew we were going to be the favorites of the evening. After watching a queen performing Brandy’s “Angel in Disguise” with two large dudes with taco meat chest hair, gimp masks and wings strapped on their backs, Ms. Lane told us it was our time to go up. We assembled on the floor and did our THANG to a medley of Lil’ Kim songs. The first part was set to the unreleased “Nobody Does It Better” and I am really sad that I don’t have video evidence of it.
We all wore bleached, ripped jeans or short shorts, cut wife beaters, water bras, and K-Swiss (I’m from Los Angeles…don’t judge). Princess Brianna, who was “Lil’ Kim” and lip syncing FOR HER LIFE had a blonde curly wig with blue ends. We looked a LOT like the 2:40 mark of this video:
I miss this Kim. The one with a normal nose who was best friends with Mary J. Blige and Missy. COME BACK, KIM!!!
Now that my memory is all nice and greased, the last part of the video and a lot of pelvic thrusting was essentially the end of our performance. It was great. Really. I can still remember the choreo and in my mind’s eye, it was brilliant.
*longing stare into space*
The crowd was hype and threw a lot of $1 bills at us. We spent it all on Denny’s later that night.
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If you’re new around these parts and made it to the end of this story, you are a saint. I bid you all good tidings and invite you to say hey via the twitter or just hang around these parts for a while. =D
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40 Responses to “…the VIP chronicles…”
Oh. My. Gosh. HAHAHAHA!!!! I think you missed your calling. This would’ve been a great career path for you. And with parental approval, how could you go wrong?
.-= Nickie Frye´s last blog ..Hidden in the Grass =-.
Alicia Reply:
July 27th, 2010 at 9:52 am
Sometimes, I really think I did…I could have been on So You Think You Can Dance by now…
*cries*
sui Reply:
July 27th, 2010 at 12:37 pm
IT’S NEVER TOO LATE!
Nickie Frye Reply:
July 27th, 2010 at 2:50 pm
I strongly encourage you to try out for So You Think You Can Dance!! With or without the weave, you are a shoe in.
.-= Nickie Frye´s last blog ..Hidden in the Grass =-.
LOL.
I love your ID. You’re almost unrecognizable!
Nice nostalgia…
.-= sui´s last blog ..I am not my hair =-.
Alicia Reply:
July 27th, 2010 at 9:51 am
It’s the eyebrows. LOL. =P
That weave is fire!
Great story.
.-= Sing´s last blog ..Something Old Made New =-.
Alicia Reply:
July 27th, 2010 at 4:18 pm
GIRL!!! Down my back. It was serious. LOL.
HA HA HA HA HA LOL!!!!! I wish you had any video evidence of this
, how I wish I could see the dance moves 
.-= jemina´s last blog ..neon =-.
LMAOOOOO. Sounds like something I would do if I knew a drag queen who would teach me a lot of pelvic thrust moves. Goooo K-Swiss! *head nod*
And Kim was popping back then- what happened to the dancing Kim?! (how many licks …. -pause-) Now my conscious is starting to box her into in a category with Jocelyn Wildenstein. She’s getting into crazy territory … Still love her though!
.-= Kenita´s last blog ..on the double =-.
What a great story! The steppers at my school competed but I never asked about their competitions.
.-= Joy D.´s last blog ..Style Heroes- Johnathon Richman =-.
O how i love throwbacks…nothin like a good trip down memeory lane eh! back when you were all innocent like i’ m sure
heheeheh. WOW you guys went IN!!!!!! Digz!!
and yes old Kim will be missed…
btw…peeped you on Coco & Creme alongside some of my all time favs!! congrats bbz!!
.-= chomy´s last blog ..hope =-.
Alicia Reply:
July 27th, 2010 at 4:20 pm
Thaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaanks! =D
Sounds like the most fun EVAH! Miss J so wishes IV had some vidiotic proof.
.-= Miss Janey´s last blog ..Dream Shopping- Not So Dreamy =-.
Lil sis that was an awesome story and i remember your dancing days, LOL!
Alicia Reply:
July 27th, 2010 at 4:20 pm
GOOD TIMES. =D
(this is my sister, y’all. she will verify that this is all true and correct)
EVERY TIME I think I couldn’t love you more…uh I SO DO! We really missed out not knowing eachother in our formidable years because that would have been a fucking mess!!! Love you BFF!!! xoxo
.-= Jessica´s last blog ..Be Radical =-.
Alicia Reply:
July 27th, 2010 at 4:19 pm
OOHHHHHHHH, that would have been a mess. The universe wasn’t ready…it STILL isn’t.
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Alicia, Licier, etc., Jessica . Jessica said: LOVE THIS SO MUCH!!! RT @InnyVinny NEW POST: as promised, the story of how I was a back up dancer for a drag queen. http://bit.ly/aBPNvx [...]
I love this so much. Why oh WHY can I just picture you doing all this? LOL
Princess B…*faints*
That’s actually my favorite Lil Kim video next to Crush On You. Had me wanting to get crunk with denim, bleach, and hot pink hair dye.
.-= Gem´s last blog ..I Write Like =-.
Alicia Reply:
July 27th, 2010 at 4:19 pm
You would have LOVED him. Ornery as hell and about 6 ft tall with a curl. And braces. I think he went to jail for check scamming or stealing a car or something.
LOL.
Kiana Reply:
July 28th, 2010 at 11:32 am
LOL, I was just going to ask you what happened to Princess B. This is all hilarious, and I think you could get away with still using your ID for discounts. Shoot, I know I do. #FIGHT ON!
HILARIOUS. & slightly inspirational. :] I bet you looked hot.
.-= Ev`Yan´s last blog ..“hair is a woman’s crowning glory” =-.
What a lovely story. I was always so jealous of girls who could dance! I daydream about having really hot moves one day. Ahhh . . .
.-= Aja´s last blog ..Je Te Veux – Satie =-.
I thoroughly enjoyed reading this story
nothing beats lil kim + drag.
Ha! Luv this story.
oh sweet heaven, we wore the same ish to school.
and i think i went myself what with all the giggling. tmi? yeah. i know.
.-= pennerad´s last blog .. =-.
ah! aahahahahahah. That’s frigging amazing. And awesomely hilarious. And fight on!
.-= birdie´s last blog ..Sip & Shop Comes to Seattle! =-.
Dance routines caused by hormonal imbalance! Hotness! Thank you, thank you for this.
What an entertaining story. Lol. Princess Briana lip syncing FOR HER LIFE. #dead That was hilarious. I remember that video inspiring me to cut up and bleach a pair of my jeans back then too.
.-= Milan´s last blog ..Shoe Obsession =-.
I’m new, I stayed, and I liked it
and now you have me wondering if I should still try the weave
.-= GC´s last blog ..hiking in Harriman State Park =-.
Alicia Reply:
July 28th, 2010 at 1:49 pm
Welcome! And thank you! =D
And I vote yes. Everyone should try it at least once.
I love this story! I dream to dance for a drag queen one day!!
.-= Linda´s last blog ..CA =-.
OMG. HILARIOUS (as I hand you the purse). I never donned a weave because i felt it was too high maintenance but man when I saw a couple of my friends or family members with them, shhhhhhhhiiiittt I seriously thought the constant flipping was part of the maintenance program to knock the dust off them horse hairs. To have a weave was to COMMAND RESPECT.
.-= LADIVASOSA´s last blog ..GOOD POINT =-.
ps weave or no weave…you are GLOWING!
.-= LADIVASOSA´s last blog ..GOOD POINT =-.
I have never in my life said this to anyone, but… WHY. CAN’T. I. BE. YOU?
How can I not love you more?!
“K-Swiss (I’m from Los Angeles…don’t judge)” hahahahhahahahahahhahahahah PREACH!
.-= STOPITRIGHTNOW´s last blog ..MORE SHIT =-.
LMFAOOOOO! But I love this one “Princess B told me that if you spray yourself all over first, the air will be perfumed when you start to sweat. I still believe it to this day.”
HAHAHAHAHA!!!!