instant vintage : 10.2009 : I’m probably going to lose a friend for this… (Uncategorized)
Preamble
I am all for people believing in what they believe. However, when people try and force their beliefs on me, I take issue. Forgive me for bringing such a controversial topic up on this here blog, but this pissed me off to no end this morning.
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Not long after I posted the last blog about my tattoo (and reading the lovely comments you all had to offer – thank you!!), I go to check my facebook messages and there is one from a old high school friend that I haven’t really talked to since my first or second year of college (read: 2002). The note read:
hey girlie, its been a while. i was reading your note about your dad. i think chey told me about it a few years ago when it happened. im sure its still a process. anyway, i know you love him and wanted to do something special for him, and Im not sure where you stand as far as your relationship with Jesus is concernced, but this is what God’s word says about tattoos:
Lev. 19:1,28- The Lord also said to Moses, Give the following instructions to the entire community of Israel. You must be holy because I, the Lord you God, am holy. Do not cut your bodies for the dead, and do not mark your skin with tattoos. I am the Lord!
Love you,
ttyl
P.S. Here’s more info if you want it
http://www.joelstockstill.com/page/2/
*pause*
My thought process after reading this is as follows:
Wow, I haven’t heard from her in a while. Did she really just pull the Leviticus card? Seriously? Wait. Ok, she’s probably concerned about the state of my soul…Wait, no…Did she really just pull the Leviticus card? I don’t think she knows I have four tattoos. For real?!?! Woooooooow…This is funny. For real? Quoting scripture to me about my tattoo…riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight…
After I grew increasingly more upset, I wondered if I should even respond. I don’t know why I wondered over this so long given my argumentative nature, but I wondered. I even consulted dudeguy.
Now, I don’t know if I’ve given you all a full background on the unicorn of this blog, but he is probably the most interesting person I know. He’s extremely intelligent, well-read, has the most “fuck you and your bullshit” attitude, cooks exceedingly well and can mix a great drink. All of that and he is unapologetically agnostic. Basically, he’s made of WIN. You can imagine what he said after I told him what happened (keep in mind that we’re unbelievably crass).
“She’s asking about your relationship with Jesus Christ? What you and Jesus do behind closed doors is none of her damn business!”
I love him…so much.
Anyway, after much talking, thought and deliberation, I responded with this:
1 – my relationship with JC shouldn’t be based on whether or not I adhere to the Jewish portion of the Bible. I cannot subscribe to a system of tenents that was used to judge, subjugate, censor, and murder people who simply believed differently. Besides, I’m pretty sure Jesus didn’t have much to say about tattoos given that early Christians wore them to identify themselves as such. In fact, he gave one commandment that has absolutely nothing to do with tattooing.
2 – I’d be more likely to put stock in your concern if I had one inkling that you sent passages from this particular book to all the men you know who cut their hair or trim/shave their facial hair in general. Something tells me that you don’t. Right now, this looks like your disapproval of my action veiled in scripture.
I’m glad to see you’re in a more positive and uplifting place, but I’d rather you not proselytize to me through facebook. I went through the dutiful Christian portion of my life and thankfully, have moved past it.
I hope all is well with you, babe. Take care.Now this is not an invitation to debate about religion, call me a heathen, blah (x3). I’m pretty steadfast in what I do and believe in and have no plans on feeling guilty about it, converting, or reverting. If that’s not the case with you, I fully respect that. However, the minute someone calls my action(s) into question without applying the same “concern” across the board to everyone that doesn’t fit into the standard they half-heartedly hold themselves to is going to get a supreme side-eye from me because that, friends, is judgement. It’s pick-and-choose judgement masked with someone else’s words.
UNCOOL.
This is just too damn much to deal with in the morning. I don’t even have a picture to offset all of this text. Boooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
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Addendum/Post Script (because I’m an asshole)
PAUL NEWMAN EVERYONE!!!!!
*stands up and drops mic a la Randy Watson in Coming to America*
22 Responses to “I’m probably going to lose a friend for this…”
Wow. I’m sure I would have sent a much more wordy and not-quite as respectful response back. I’m kind of in disbelief to be honest.
Ashe Mischief´s last blog ..Marie Denee–Fabulous Plus Sized Fashions
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Ohhhh boy. My general response to bs like that? “Pretty sure God’s given up on me since the drugs, sex,lying, stealing, and cheating.He’s got loads more to worry about with me than tattoos.” Why is that the most religious people are generally the most unaccepting? Your tattoo is a beautiful way to memorialize your father.
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Jeeeeeez. From one heathen to another (haha), I probably wouldn’t have responded near as nicely as you did. In fact, I’m would have lost my shit. Religious differences aside, that’s completely patronizing and just downright rude. And HELLO, you already got the damn tattoo, even if you suddenly had a change of heart brought on by an asinine self-righteous individual, what would you do?
You should have asked her if she eats seafood, since AFAIK that’s explicitly forbidden in Leviticus as well.
*sighs and shakes head* oohhh people. they just can’t leave well enough alone.
(apologies if I just left two comments, I kept getting an odd error)
Michelle´s last blog ..Marvelous Monday!
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Why does it seem as if the people who rep for religion the hardest only apply it halfheartedly and to things that don’t even concern them? That chaps my ass. If you’re gonna judge me, be bold and do it outright…don’t try to hide behind scriptures and verses.
Mika´s last blog ..kicksandcake: I’m really ready for fall weather. I’m tired of this damn heat.
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Kudos to you for such a civilized response. I would have replied back with some version of “seriously? get the fuck outta here” and called it a day. I have a few “friends” on facebook who have become Jesus warriors in the worst kind of self-righteous and hypocritical ways…they are annoying and I’ve unfriended a few for posting homophobic/generally ignant dogma on my wall. I’m sorry that girl tried to ruin your moment. Your tattoo is teh awesome.
The end.
Angela´s last blog ..I’m Not a Sensitive Black Female.
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And this is why a lot of people these days take issue with so-called Christians. A lot can be judgmental, close-minded, and self righteous.
Side note: I grew in a christian household, and my mother is a devout christian, and she had NO problems with my tattoo. And as you mentioned, she was the one who told me about early christians tattooing themselves to identify themselves as such.
She´s last blog ..‘IRL’.
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HEATHEN TABERNACLE! I loved your response. Dudeguy’s response made me lose consciousness for a minute. Anyhoo, even if she truly believes this gobbledeygook, why would she tell you this AFTER you already got the tattoo? Are you supposed to repent, hail mary, whatever, and scrub the tattoo off or just live with “bad Christian guilt”? Girl, BYE!
Gem´s last blog ..Your Love is Mine
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Amen.
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high f*cking five @ proselytize. PREACH, SISTA!!!
pick-and-choose judgment is the worst. I HATE THAT SHIT.i feel you handled this extremely well.
remind me to call you when i have beef and i’m burning up with anger and have NOTHING to say (as usual, lol).
pennerad´s last blog ..
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Very well written response. When people throw Hayseuss into the mix, ish gets touchy. Its bad enough fellow agnostics and the like have to remind ourselves to not sound judgemental when dealing with the more religious folk, but we also have to remind religious folk about their judgements towards us…while at the same time not being judgemental. *head explodes*
Mr. Mister´s last blog ..Stilletto Stoners?
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Well amen to that.
Lenya Jones´s last blog ..WhoWhatWear.com – Inspired by Balmain
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Wow, you handled that better than I would have. I probably would have just said, “Effing REALLY?” and stopped talking to her altogether. As another fellow heathen (ha), I cannot stand it when people pick and choose tenets of their faith to pass judgment on others. If you believe in Jesus, Allah, Vishnu, etc. cool, I have no problem with that. But don’t use those beliefs to pass judgment on something I did/said that you don’t agree with. Ugh!
Anyway, I didn’t comment on your previous post from yesterday but it made me tear up a bit. I think the way you chose to pay tribute to your dad’s life and memory is absolutely beautiful.
Brush those haters off. (I think that’s in the Book of Deuteronomy…)
Danielle´s last blog ..Thoughts on exhibiting
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As the resident Preacher’s Kid (PK) I really am glad you took a stand. A lot of times, people do exactly what you think she did…judge and then hide behind scripture.
Jesus ref aside, why tell someone you disapprove when the thing is already there? Are you going to laser it off just because some long lost friends says “Shame on you?”
I think the tattoo is beautiful and sentimental. I love it when people tatt things that mean something on them. So, You Go Girl! Bah!
Felicia´s last blog ..Sp3ctrum Video Tutorial
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I would have added a lot… A LOT of derogatory words. Good job.
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Ugh, I hate it when people express themselves with Bible quotes. Unless I subscribe to their beliefs, what’s written in there means nothing to me. Anyway, I thought that “judge not” and “turn the other cheek” and sentiments of that ilk were the major selling point of Christianity, not nosiness and insensitivity. Super lame.
Hannah´s last blog ..The Song Is Love
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you use such big words. that christian sucks.
that’s all i got.
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I want to say, “Oh my God!” but that would be taking the Lord’s name in vain. I don’t want to get in trouble on Facebook. *rolling eyes*
WendyB´s last blog ..The Coveted’s Candid Camera
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oh wow.
This is something I deal with on a weekly basis in person. I’m a 26yr old female who has conservative Jewish beliefs and upbringing. My cousins are actually the local Hasidim rabbis, but my family doesn’t attend their synagogue.
Anyways…I’m very heavily tattooed and have been for about 8years now. My family has never shunned me because of them, so I’m not sure why other people outside of my family feel like it’s ok for them to question my beliefs or lifestyle. I constantly get those comments along the lines of “you won’t be buried in a Jewish cemetery”, which I then reply to them with a laugh and explain to them that they’re wrong.
It’s so amusing to me that people feel the need to go out of their way to let you know you’re doing something religiously wrong by getting tattoos. I always wonder if it makes them feel better about themselves, like as if they’re going to change your mind and you’ll go get the tattoo lasered off. Sometimes I want to look at the person and say “OH NO really?! I had no idea that was true, maybe I should go make an appointment to have these removed”
ignorant idiots.
Betsey J´s last blog ..Vogue China November: Zhou Xun
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Let’s all just believe in karma instead and some day soon your Facebook ‘friend’ will slip, trip, and fall down a hole. (I originally wrote something that probably was not appropriate to say in public. In fact definitively not.)
Also I’m stealing ‘Basically, he’s made of WIN.’ Brilliant!
xx
Ella´s last blog ..The Last Days of Sun – Shoreditch and Dalston Street Style
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what’s a leviticus?
jennine´s last blog ..Perricone MD Skin Care Giveaway
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You know what’s funny to me about folks who breathe judgment from the depths of their lungs??? They never EVER take a look at the bullshit they conjure up, cause, take part in, or the sins they’ve accumulated over the years. They are always so quick to shine the light on someone else. You’re better than me, b/c I would have defriended her w/o a damn response, simple and plain. *shakes head*
trE´s last blog ..jackson’s kids’ reality?|onyx still scares me
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WOW———-OH HELL NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! I cannot believe she did that! I’m loving your response to it—it was perfect!
The Style and Beauty Doctor´s last blog ..The Week in Beauty and Style
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